Full Moon: Intention (April 28)

I release my fear to move forward.

Dream: "Not Yet"

I'm out in a large open field, I remember seeing pussy willows and the rest was a golden yellow and bright beautiful fresh green. I'm wearing a brown dress, it's warm, I am crouching, I'm watching for something, but I can tell what it is.
I have a knife in my hand, and I'm 'hunting' (in waking life I do not eat meat or seafood etc).
There is a flash in the sky, heat lightening I think? Suddenly I'm stalking a guy, I can't see who he is, he is wearing a long peacoat with a hood and not facing my direction. I'm about 8 ft away I'd estimate. He starts walking backwards toward me, but it's very slow seeming. He gets about 4 ft away and turns so he facing me, he doesn't look at me though, but I see the light reflect off my knife onto his face.
I stand up, I feel weird, almost like I have motion sickness. We stare each other down, I'm holding my knife so tight my hand aches. I feel he is as scared as I am.
He says "Not yet" and I wake up feeling empty and lonely

Dream: "Ever"

I was driving a small blue car (in waking life I do not drive) it was night time, and there were white christmas lights on the tree, for decorations, they were illuminating the road in front of me, it was really lovely. My male ( I do not knoew, but did in my dream) was in the passenger seat. We pull into a drive way, it's one of the kind where it's shaped like a 'U' to leave, and surrounding it were those trees that look like mini pink willow trees. Everything smelled sweet like summer, cherry blossoms, and fresh cut grass.

I get out of the car, I'm extremely excited and know this is my 'home' in the dream. We walk inside and it's 'our house' not just mine. I run into the hall, and open a door quietly. The room has a dim set of christmas lights hanging from the wall, and on the wall is painted beautifully purple and pink clouds at sunset, I know in the dream that I painted this. The room smells like fresh cut lilacs.

In the center by the window is a crib, with a tiny little girl. She is standing, holding the side.
She has a huge grin on her face, her mouth is tiny and pink, and she has long beautiful eyelashes and bright blue happy eyes. Her hair is so soft, and darkish blonde, she reaches up and I know she our daughter. (I dream about a daughter a lot, I assume this represents a repressed child self, possibly?)
She reaches to him, though I'm holding her and makes a fist then lays her hand on his and says 'Ever'.

Everything is kind of choppy for a second, then I walk into the other room with her, the light is off, and there is a really big fish aquarium, it's light is on, making everything in the room, kind of blue.
Everything is calm. My 'daughter' points at the kitten that run into the room and she squeals excitedly 'Meeeeee-ow!!!"

Spring has Sprung. I've been born for the 23rd time.

I'm fully aware that nothing is as they seem, being so, I wish more people would put that in consideration when giving other people advice on how to live their lives, and what pace they should be living at.

I like to believe at 23, my life is not even one 4th over yet.
I have years to decide if the things I choose are indecisions... or choices that have increased my chances in being successful in the things that I strive for.

I'm not looking for love, peace, wealth. I'm looking for answers.
I'm on a mission.... and no one will be conducting this orchestrial catastrophe but me.

New Moon: Intention ( April 14th)

I am more intune to soul's need.