Friday, January 15, 2010

Dream- "My Babies"


I had a dream that we were at my grandparents house for a holiday
dinner, it was winter, and me and boyfriend walked in and I was hugging
everyone, and then my old art teacher showed up.
And I was talking to
him about how I've been trying to draw more often,
and as I'm
talking to him I'm looking out a picture window, that in front of the
picture window outside is the driveway,
and then a railing and a
huge drop/cliff to the river next to the house.
The river is sort of
flooded right now, and the snow is crisp because no one dares to get
close to railing.

Well, I'm looking out and a car pulls out, a
guy gets out, he is dark haired and very tall, he has three little boys
with him.
A tiny toddler, maybe almost 2 years old in a blue and
yellow coat, he is tiny and you can only see his eyes because he is so
bundled up, then there's a little boy probably about 3 years in a grey
coat, he is hugging the tiny one to keep them warm,
and the tiny one
is crying, I assume because he is cold.
Then there is an older boy
about 4 or maybe even a small five year old in a red coat, he is talking to the dad,

and the dad isn't responding he is doing something in the trunk.
I
keep getting nervous cause there are tiny kids by the railing, and my
grandma never wanted me to go near it when I was little.

The dad
has this blank expression on his face, I'm using hand motions to talk to
my art teacher,
but I have no idea now if I was talking or just
watching mouth wide open...
The dad tries to pick up the two little
boys up, but the one slips out from his arm, he seems frustrated,
In
the dream I say "What the hell is that guy doing?!"
everyone turns
around to look, as he grasps the two younger boys by their collars of
their coats,
and he swings the tiniest one off the cliff into the
river.

My brain frantically goes slow motion as I'm screaming
tearing out of the house,
the only thought in my head is to shove
that guy off the cliff so he can't hurt the other two, I'm screaming
silently, I feel myself get hot with fear and anger.
I'm running in slow motion my body is shaking and my legs barely hit the ground I running so hard.
My grandpa runs to the
closet I hear a gun clicking while he loads it quickly,
I don't understand, is he going to shoot the guy?

but I'm
already running out the door across the yard hands out ready to shove,
my eyes have a sheild of tears, my mouth screaming silently still, I'm hysterical.
I'm thinking "my babies!"
I have no coat or shoes on, I don't
care.
I want that guy dead, I want to save the little boys that I keep associating with "My babies" (I don't have children yet) , I want to jump
in the river and find the other one.
My boyfriend grabs my sweater,
running behind me, he has to tackle me to the ground and stop me,
he
says without words that the guy is so big he could easily swing me over
the edge too,
I don't care I NEED to stop this, I'm shoving hard trying to get up
I'm
screaming in my dream to wake up.

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